"I love my baby, but..." Many teenage parents have used this statement to describe their situation when they become parents. Teen parents have to walk this line of contradiction when they decide to raise a child. They feel as though they should recognize their choices as a mistake but the baby itself is not. Why is that? Why do so many teens feel that having sex, creating a child, and deciding to raise that child is a mistake? when not too long ago, if a 16 or 17 year old took the same actions, it would have been a delighted decision instead of frowned upon or judged so harshly. Forty, fifty years ago, many teenagers were having sex and having children at young ages and raising their families. But our society today, holds teenage parenting as a shameful act and that our teenagers have a certain path to follow and that they shouldn't turn away from it.
I feel as though teen parents shouldn't have to look at their decisions as a mistake unless it truly was. When two people decide to have sex they should be aware of all the consequences and be ready to handle whatever comes their way physically, emotionally, and financially. So if they do become parents then they won't have to regret their decisions. Our society is to blame for shaming these young parents in doing what they think is best for them in their situations. It should be okay for them to say they made a mistake, they don't like what they did without being judged for it. For the parents having these children, for some it has changed their lives drastically for the better and have helped to actually pursue dreams they never would have before. And for others they run from it. But making the decision to have sex shouldn't be said as a mistake unless they were truly not ready. I feel as though having a child as a teen should be looked at the same. Teen parents should be able to say, "Yes! I had a baby." and be proud of their decisions to do so. It shouldn't have to be one way or the other. They shouldn't have to feel if they have sex and have a child, that their decision is a mistake or wrong in any way, unless they truly as if it is. They shouldn't have to deal with outside participants influencing them to feel a certain way. They may have disappointed people in their families with their decision but if they are truly happy with their decisions then the parents should be allowed to feel that way. To me, teenage parenting is only a mistake if you're not ready and didn't think about your consequences for sex. Its a blessing in disguise, you just have to realize it is.
~Nikki Walton
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ReplyDelete16 and Pregnant said...
ReplyDeleteI see what you are saying Nikki. It is definitely a socially created idea that it is "right" to wait to have kids till you are older. You are right though they (these young parents) should know what the consequences are going in when they decide to start having sex. And this doesn't even just go for young people, but adults as well. There should definitely be less of a stigma on these young parents, but there also needs to be more young people actually knowing what it takes to be a parent, because it is a lifetime decision.
Erin Richeson
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ReplyDeleteTeen mothers should not feel as though they have to say that they made a mistake. On the other hand some girls may have really made a mistake, by having sex before they were ready or having sex with the wrong person. However, a mother's love for their child prevents them from calling their child a mistake. The word mistake implies that if you could go back and change having your baby you would. However, most (not all) mothers love their babies way too much to every wish that they did not have them.
ReplyDeleteBrittaney Vaughn
I sort of agree with Nikki but at the same time I don't believe that teenagers are ready to have children for the simple reason that they are not taught to be parents at a young age as teens were 50 years ago. Because of this major shift in priorities teen parents are not prepared to raise a child and with all of the options that are presented to us they have a harder time distinguishing between what is good for them and what is good for their child. The only way to change is is by taking on the mentality that was present many years ago and teach teens what it means to be a parent so that if they do get pregnant they know how to raise a child and not have to stumble their way through it.
ReplyDelete-Ana Gutierrez
I completely agree with everything you said here. I do not understand why pregnancy was such a good thing is history and why it is so frowned upon now. I feel as if pregnancy is something to be celebrated. Bringing a new life into this world is such a beautiful thing and it has lost it's meaning because of how often it occurs. It has especially lost its meaning among teenagers. Pregnancy, in my opinion, should always be considered a gift and never a mistake. If teens feel like they are regretting or will regret their decisions they should consider the alternatives, such as adoption. There re so many families who would treasure that baby and these teens would rather be hanging out with their friends and almost see their baby as a punishment. I am not speaking for all teens here, but when the majority talks about their live there always seems to be a "but" statement. Teens should think about their actions and do what is best for them and will be best for them in the future.
ReplyDelete-Alex Antoniou